Tuesday 31 January 2012

A huge favour to ask!  Even if you are a non-believer.  I have this superstition....most of you know of it and probably think I'm totally weird but it is a family thing that we have done all my life!  On the first day of each month the FIRST words out of your mouth must be "White Rabbits!"  If you remember to say this you will have good luck for the entire month! Perhaps you wouldn't mind sending some of the luck my way?   I'm thinking a little good luck right now would be a really good thing.  Kelli gave me a white rabbit for Christmas (not real Thank God!)  Her name is Isabelle (after my Mom) and I am going to take her to bed tonight so that when I open my eyes I will remember!  I did say it January 1st and I have had a pretty good month.  Need February to be good too!  Thanks to all who will follow this directive.  It may also help with our lottery situation girls!

Have had a great day.  Got my radiation over early and was back home before 10 AM.  Always good to get that finished ASAP and get on with the business of enjoying the day.  Bill and I met one of his friends from his working days who totally inspires me!  Several years ago she was diagnosed with colon cancer, had six organs removed and went through seven months of chemo.  Basically spent 15 months lying on her back looking at the ceiling wondering if she would ever be the same again.  Recovered, and became a world traveller spending two years travelling the globe solo, going to all sorts of interesting places.  She looks as healthy as can be and I could have talked to her for hours.  She is now back home for a bit but is looking to head off to India to do a yoga/belly dancing experience and was interested in hearing about our Nepal trip!  I think I just found a new hero to inspire me!  We're thinking our next trip will be Africa!  I missed out when Kelli and Bill went and it is a trip I have always wanted to do.  Seeing the gorillas in Uganda would be the dream of a lifetime and of course the safari experience is one everyone should do!  Up close and personal with a lion!!!  Bring it on!
So the countdown continues....Treatment ends in 7 days, 19 hours, 25 minutes and 46 seconds!!!!!
I can hardly believe it....I am in the home stretch!

Monday 30 January 2012

I AM INTO MY LAST FULL WEEK!  Still have three days next week but a week from Wednesday the treatment portion is finished!  One more chemo and 7 more radiations.  Monday is my whammy day for therapy.  I start with exercise therapy before we leave for the hospital (it keeps me calm), then head off for chemotherapy, followed by radiation therapy, followed by lunch out (we are getting to know all the trendy little coffee places in NW Calgary)  I could start writing a food blog!  Thankfully Bill respectfully is not taking me to MacDonalds!  After lunch it is a little retail therapy, followed by some outdoor therapy in Nosehill Park.  Today I went to the park with a bag of treats in order to facilitate "rapid recall"!  In the past two weeks we have come across two pooches sporting quilled faces!  Boomer has had it three times now which proves he's a pretty boy....not a pretty smart boy!  Food however does have it's merits and if I give him a treat at the beginning of the walk he is instantly to me when I call him!  If I was smarter I would carry those treats all the time so maybe he and I have something in common!

My favourite radiation tech at the hospital (the one training to run a 10km race in March) is off to Hawaii for a week on a conference!  Why don't teachers get conferences in Hawaii.  She has been working on a different unit so I hadn't seen her in awhile.  Friday she was back on my unit and I said I was worried she was sick of my coaching her on her running.  She laughed and said no she had just been moved but the running was going really well.  However, having said that she wouldn't be able to take advantage of the weekend as she was going on a business trip.  Her partner looked totally disgusted and finally said aren't you going to ask her where her business trip is?  She laughed and told me she was going to the big island for the week at which point I told her to make sure to take her running shoes!  My personal nagging theory is "never, ever miss an opportunity to nag!"  I will be sending each of my commitment friends a personal email this evening!  Haven't heard from a few of them in a bit so think I better get on their butts!!! Having said that I must say I am really happy that so many of you are taking your fitness seriously these days.  When I was first diagnosed Bill said to me everyone's going to be saying if this happened to Leslie, why the heck bother!  Well many of my friends are taking the exact opposite approach and I'm so proud of all of you!  "This happened to Leslie and she's going to beat it because she is such a healthy person!"  That's the RIGHT ATTITUDE GIRLS!!!  I LIKE YOUR ATTITUDE!

Sunday 29 January 2012

I am into my last full week of treatment.  Still have 2 chemos to go and 8 radiations!  Thanks for all the positive mojos I received from those of you who read my "sad" story on Saturday!  Fortunately it was a short lived spell!  I have been doing so well that I was getting a little cocky.  Haven't really paid attention to the list of foods I should avoid!  My problems could have been related to the fact I ate about five foods not recommended the number one worst being tomato soup!  Anyways...had a rough, rough day Friday and basically sat in a chair all day Saturday but today I hit the floor running!  Got back to the business of working out, went out for a delicious brunch at my friends' Maureen and Duane.  Can those two ever cook!  Such a treat to go to their place for a meal!  Later, Kelli and I did the Nose Hill Loop with a very happy Boomer!  A great day all around!

Not much else to report today so perhaps can share another one of my "inspirational" stories.  (And I must warn you I have quite a few of them.  I sometimes wake up at night thinking about the inspirational people who have touched my life with their battles.  This story is about my friend Kathy's son, Robbie.  Robbie is one of those special people who has dazzled the medical system with his resiliency and tenacity!  Around the age of 9 he was diagnosed with a rare condition and the doctors told Kathy he would be lucky to make his teens.  I remember the day she called me at school and I left for the day and we went for a walk and a talk.  It was a terrible day.  No parent ever wants to hear those words but when your child is only 9 it is even worse!  In any case Kathy and her husband did everything in their power to help Robbie and not only did he make his teens, he continued to do quite well on a very complex and rigid drug regime.  Around the age of 18 his health started to deteriorate and the doctors told them he would need a lung transplant within the year if he was to survive.  Almost a year to the date the doctors told them this they got a call late into the evening telling them to come to Edmonton.  They had a matched set of lungs!  I'll never forget that phone call.  It still makes me tear up as I right this blog.

Robbie went through a double lung transplant and continues to thrive.  Not only is he alive and kicking, he is a thriving example of what our medical system can do for us.  Last year he graduated with a Business degree from the University of Calgary and attended the World Transplant Games in Sweden!
He celebrates two birthdays each and every year.  One for the day he was born....the other for the day he received his lungs.  He and I plan to compare our scars when this is over but I am pretty sure his will be more impressive than mine!  Pretty cool story eh???  Thought you might like this one.

Saturday 28 January 2012

Had kind of decided I would not write on the weekends but it has been such a down day I decided to perk myself up and send out a message.  Unfortunately Dr. Sinha was right. (I am sorry Dr. Sinha for calling you Dr. Doom and Gloom) Think I was getting a little cocky at how well things were going.  Well...his less than sub human prediction came true yesterday.  I was a little off in the afternoon but went out anyways.  By the time we got home I had a fever and chills and pretty extreme pain.  Thank goodness for DRUGS!!!  I have quite the arsenal to draw upon and was not proud about pill popping last night.  Spent a restless night propped up on pillows which isn't the most comfortable way to spend the night.  Every time I opened my eyes either Bill or Kelli was there taking my temperature as I was running a fever most of the night.  Woke up this morning and cancelled all the fun things I had planned for day!  What a bummer.  I was really looking forward to coffee with the girls and a Reiki session with Amy followed by dinner with Trish and Gerry!  Not today!  Basically sat in a chair all day while Bill cleaned and cooked and did laundry!   Jenifer came by and took Boomer for a walk which I was totally grateful for as was he! Feeling much better tonight and hope I've turned the corner.  I guess I should just be happy I got through 3 really good weeks and should expect that there are going to be some rough days!  My neighbour told me the other day if anyone saw me they would think this was a cake walk!  Maybe not if they had seen me yesterday! Anyways....shall pick myself up, dust myself off, take my meds and get on with it!!!

Friday 27 January 2012

TGIF!!!  AHHH...how I love Fridays.  I am now three weeks into my treatment and although I am weary today I am still not feeling any adverse effects.  Could be the $800 worth of anti nausea meds that I take. Only 12 days 1 hour 30 minutes and 39 seconds left until the treatment phase of this journey is complete!

I remain positive and focussed and want to share an email I received from my friend Kunsang.  As most of you know Geoff, Lindsey, Bill and I spent 6 weeks in Nepal last year.  We loved the people there and did manage to master a few expressions in the  Nepali and Tibetan languages.  When I came back I loved to greet Kunsang with the Tibetan gretting "Tashi Delek"  It always brough a huge smile to his face!   Kunsang is one of my favourites at work! When I was first diagnosed he sent me an email with the following message. "Tibetans believe in 'Karma'.  That means something related to your previous life.  There is a saying in Tibetan.....'If you have fear of some pain or suffering you should examine whether there is anything you can do about it.  If you can there is no need to worry about it.  If you cannot do anything then there is also no need to worry.'  This message has stuck with me and I re-read it often.  Thankyou Kunsang for these wise words!

Yesterday was a fun day.  I managed to catch up with several teacher pals who have all scattered to various other schools!  We went to Starbucks and had a good gab!  It was so nice to talk about normal stuff.  Contract negotiations, misbehaving kids, problems at work, dogs, family, weddings........thanks girls!  It was great to spend a couple of hours with you!  Signing off for the weekend!!!  Planning to lie low....... Talk to you all Monday!

Thursday 26 January 2012

Well, just about the end of week three!  9 more radiations and 2 more chemos and I still have my hair although it isn't looking so good!  Very dry and wiry!  Look like a stuck my finger in an electric socket!  Every day's a bad hair day!  Kind of makes you think it might be good if it did fall out.

Yesterday I was rambling on people who have inspired and taught me along the way...I continue to reflect on that and have many amazing people who have set examples of courage and determination which I believe lays the foundation for me to try to do the same.  As most of you know I have been hugely involved in the Terry Fox Run for the past 15 years.  Some of you, however, may not be aware of the story of how this came to be and it is actually quite a good one.  When I first arrived at Ranchlands School back in 1997, the first thing that was handed to me was a box labelled "Terry Fox Run" with the instruction that the admin expected me to organize the run for the school within the first two weeks of school.  Frankly I was stunned, having never even attempted organizing such an event.  I pretty much threw it together, talked it up with the students (at that time the school population was close to 600 kids)  We raised $1000 that year and I thought that was fantastic!  For the next couple of years we continued on the same trend, raising between one and two thousand dollars.  Then around year five we had an earth shattering event for the school.  One of our Grade 5 students, a lovely student named Jacqueline was diagnosed with a very rare form of leukemia.  She was in treatment for over a year missing her entire grade 5 year of school.  She was a very sick kid and there were fears she may not make it.  That year the school rallied and we raised over $5000 in support of Jacqueline.  I remember her coming to our run the following September with no hair and looking quite frail.  Her good friend Emily shaved her head that year and raised $500 in support of Jacqueline.  Despite a long and difficult treatment regime with many side effects Jacqueline recovered.  Last year she got married and is now the picture of health! She is a living example of why the funds we raise for these causes are so important!  A few years later one of our young teachers, Colleen Jurgens decided she would like to shave her head if the kids could beat their $5000 record, not a hard thing to do really when Colleen herself raised over $2000 for the cause.  I was busy talking it up, talking it up....(you know how I do love to talk) and the kids became curious that if I was that enthusiastic about Colleen shaving her head why didn't I shave mine?  Well, to make a long story short a few of us told them that if they could raise over $10.000 we would do it.  The good news was they had less than a week to make that happen.  Those of us who had put forth that promise were pretty confidant our locks were safe.  What we failed to think about was our conniving secretary Bernice.  Bernice got busy emailing and by Friday we were at the $13,000 mark.  Head shave day came and seven ladies and one male principal gave up their hair in front of the entire school population.  I wore a hat for two weeks before Bill reminded me that the kids had paid for that haircut and they had a right to see it  Once I got used to going hatless I started to enjoy my new do although it did draw many stares.  I didn't have to comb my hair for almost 6 months, washing it was a breeze....but it was slow to return.  The following year I had students who decided they wanted to shave their heads too.  This seemed like a good idea and we decided that in order for a student to participate they had to of course have parental approval and needed to raise a minimum of $200 to show their commitment and seriousness.  The first year we shaved student heads we also decided to present an award to the student who most exemplified the spirit of Terry Fox.  Bill donated this plaque to the school and it has become a tradition each fall to name one student who most exemplifies the spirit of Terry Fox.  Those qualities included commitment, dedication, kindness and determination.  We have run the head shave for several years now and despite a shrinking school population have raised up to $23,000 in a given year.  We have been recognized by the Terry Fox Foundation as one of the top schools in Canada for our fundraising efforts (to date we have raised over $150,000 for this worthwhile organization.  We were honoured with visits from both Betty Fox, Terry's mother and Fred Fox his brother.  The children at my school view Terry Fox as a hero and they enthusiastically embrace this event each and every year.  I am so proud of their efforts and generosity!  I have no doubt that they will carry this spirit of giving into their adult lives.  They are amazing kids and I do miss them!

This is a bit of a random entry but one I wanted to share with you as many of you are now throwing your support behind my son Geoff and his team of riders who will be doing the Ride to Conquer Cancer in June.  We are very touched by your generosity and cannot thank you enough for your ongoing support!

Wednesday 25 January 2012

First of all, a big thankyou to all who have thrown their support behind Geoff!  You are the world to me my friends!  Hugs to all of you!

Today a long day at the hospital.  Had to see both the Radiation Oncology Nurse and the Chemo Doc.
My Radiation Oncologist has gone to India for three weeks so I won't be seeing him until after my surgery.  Although I think he is an excellent doctor I won't miss his gloom and doom lecture each week.  My other doctor on the other hand is so positive, praises me for continuing my workout routine and tells me there is strong research supporting the fact that people who continue to exercise through their treatments do better!  He is also impressed with my weight gain (glad he is....I'm not! But again research shows people with some reserves do better!)  I am definitely sporting some reserves at the moment.  He commented on the fact I still have my hair....although I was having a very bad hair day today!  A little worried as it is dry and dull...hope this isn't the end of it!  Kelli on the other hand wouldn't mind seeing me lose it as she bought me a great little hat.  I did wear it today to cover the bad hair day!  It could become a permanent fixture on my head!

Have been thinking today about people who have inspired me along the way and it occurred to me that we go through life learning from others even when we don't know it's happening.  My Mom passed away from Lymphoma almost 11 years ago.  She was a total rock through her treatment.  The only time I saw her cry was the day she told us she had been diagnosed with cancer and her tears were for what she would be putting us through.  From that point forward she was the most proactive, positive person one could imagine, managing her treatments her care and continuing on with her life.  Her sense of humour never disappeared.  I remember the day I went with her to have a scan and we had to fill out a questionnaire.  The tech finally said, Mrs. May, have your daughter fill in the questionnaire while you have your cocktail (barium).  Well, I asked the questions and she answered.  My Mom was 69 at the time and about halfway through the questionnaire the question came up "Are you Breast feeding?"  I posed the question and my mom looked at me deadpan serious and said "Are you hungry?"  Well, the two of laughed so hard we just about fell out of the cubicle we were in.  I think the tech thought we were the strangest pair he had over seen.  Our family was able to enjoy almost 2 years with her following her initial diagnosis and we have never forgotten her spirit and her courage.

My brother was diagnosed with MS a couple of years ago.  I am so proud of the proactive way he has been managing his life and his treatment.  He has the attitude that he is going to live his life to the fullest. He and his wife Michelle continue to ski, windsurf, hike and do the activities he loves.  He follows a rigid diet that is supposed to help control his symptoms.  I don't know how he does it.  No gluten, no dairy, no red meat.....hard for a guy who like me loves cinnamon buns and pie!  He got involved in a drug study that seems to be holding things in check for him.  He is doing positively everything he can to maintain a quality life and is doing a darn good job of it.  Through all  of this he has supported me and my battle.  That is what family is about and I thank him and hope he know how much we admire is ATTITUDE!!!

I am now in the home stretch and sprinting for the finish line!!!  Only 2 more chemos and 10 more radiations.

Tuesday 24 January 2012

HALFWAY!!!!  YABADABADOOOO!!!!!
So today no talk of chemo, radiation.....going to make an appeal instead.  Many of you have sent me messages saying "What can I do....just say it!"  I have never been so spoiled in my entire life but I do have one small request.  I know we all have our causes that we support but if you have any wiggle room on your causes for 2012 would you consider sponsoring my son Geoff.  He has decided to form a team called the Honey Badgers, for the "Ride to Conquer Cancer" in support of me.  When cornered the Honey Badger has been reported to be the most fierce animal in the world by National Geographic.  (this is what he thinks of me his Mom!)   His ambitious goal  is for his team to raise $20,000.  I was invited to ride but think June 23 might be a little soon to be taking on a 200 km bike ride,

 so instead I will be an honorary Honey Badger in the support wagon!  I am posting his message below.  If you want to do something this would be something I would really appreciate.  I have been a staunch supporter of the Terry Fox Foundation for the past 16 years and will continue my support there as well but I am throwing my support behind the Honey Badgers this year.


Hello friends and family,

As some of you know already my Mom was diagnosed with esophageal cancer a little before Christmas. She is currently getting treated and we are on the road to beating it. My Mom has been truly inspirational throughout the process. Her courage, strength and determination have been amazing.   

I am writing to you now to ask for your support, i have been inspired to do the ride to conquer cancer this year - a 2 day, 200km bike ride from Calgary to Canmore and back. My team's name is the Honey Badgers.  I chose the Honey Badger because it is fearless animal that will take on any challenge no matter how daunting it may seem. My mom's courage and determination is inspiring, like the honey badger she is fealess in her fight against cancer. My personal goal is to raise $3000, which will go towards gastronintestinal cancers. My team has also set a cumulative goal of raising $20,000. The team is open for people to join so if you are interested you can email me and i will give you the details. The ride is big commitment, so even your support with a donation would be much appreciated.

Here is the link to donate to me and my ride to conquer cancer;

http://www.conquercancer.ca/site/TR/Events/Alberta2012?px=2887840&pg=personal&fr_id=1411

Thanks in advance for you support!!!

Sincerely,


Geoff 

Monday 23 January 2012

Well, more than half way on the chemos and close to halfway on the radiations.  Spent the entire day at the hospital today.  It makes a long day but both Kelli and Bill came and kept me company.  Everything still going well.  Passed my bloodwork test, that's always a good thing. Went to a session on understanding chemotherapy which was a bit of a waste of time.  If you read the handouts they gave you there was nothing new in the session.  The room was warm and Kelli and I were both nodding off in the back row.  Suspect Bill might have been too.

Left there and went for my usual Monday retail therapy.  Nothing too exciting this week.  A popcorn maker and a humidifier that Bill has been busy researching and has decided to return.  So today's therapy a bit of a bust I'm thinking.  I'll have to do better next week! Spent a good portion of the day fretting that my co-workers at school might be the $25 million winners.  I have contributed every single month, in fact I was the organizer and this is the first month I have missed.  I will be jumping off the highest building if they won!  Sorry girls.....I'm not cheering for you on this one but I will be handing in my $10 for February!  It is not worth it to be feeling left out on something like this.  I'm hoping they will kindly phone or email me to put me out of my misery.  This would truly be the icing on the cake! (what kind of  a sour grapes attitude is that!  YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF YOUR ATTITUDE!)
Had a very quiet weekend.  Geoff and Lindsey have BRAVELY consented to let me do a video for their wedding.  Many of you have been the recipients of these efforts over the years and I can just sense your shudder as I write this.  Judy?  Bernice?  The entire population of Ranchlands School?  I am just rubbing my hands together on this one!  It is going to be such fun.  Thankyou my dear kids for putting your trust in me. I will not disappoint!  My friends will definitely admire your blind trust in this endeavour and probably question your sensibilities!  If any call to caution you pay no heed!
I am going to attach a picture of today for you!  Enjoy.  This is what my Mondays look like but only for two more weeks!

Friday 20 January 2012

TGIF never sounded so good!  Was at the hospital bright and early.....machine down again so had to go to another unit.  Visited with some new faces and came away feeling grateful that I am better off than many!  Today a really quiet day at home and I am happy for that.  Things have been piling up and I have been pretty much on the go.  Feel a little like I'm running on empty today.  Woke up this morning with some heartburn which I have been told will become a problem for me as time goes on.  Never had that before and was not impressed.  Layed around for an hour and then decided to get up and have my workout.  This is exactly how my Dad would handle things.....work it out!  It actually worked and I felt much better after my session.  Bill and Kelli just snorted!  Just like Mom to think exercise fixes everything....well maybe not everything but it is a pretty good start!  It was enough to motivate the two of them to hit the weight room at the CWC today and got my friend Kathy kick started as well!  Nothing like shaming people into it eh?

Got a fabulous lift today from a good friend in Houston.  She sent me a parcel of "Texas Tears!"  It was like Christmas all over again!  I got a cozy University of Texas Hoodie (most famous of the university teams in Texas), a touque and countless other little treasures.  Even Boomer got a UT chew toy endorsed by Rae's Newfie, Abbie!  I hope you are reading this Rae because you brought a grin to my face today!

Although I would never ever choose to take this journey I am on at the moment, it has truly brought the value of good friends and family to the forefront.  Never underestimate the power of care my friends!  You have made such a difference to me.  To know I have so many people in my corner sending their prayers, positive energy, warm thoughts, gifts of time and gifts of the heart has been truly amazing.  I will owe you all for the rest of my life.

Thursday 19 January 2012

Happy Thursday and almost the end of week two.  Still going strong!  Had to be at the hospital for 7:50 AM this morning.  For some strange reason made much better time this morning.  Fewer drivers for some reason, maybe everyone decided to finally stay home for a change.  Earlier in the week the commute has been brutal!  Consequently I was there half an hour early but that was OK because one of the machines was down for maintenance and that can make for a long wait if you have to go later in the day.

I have now taken to counselling my radiation tech on his health practices.  He confessed to me today that he hates running and has a love affair with potato chips but he doesn't like what the chips are doing to him so he's been trying out a bike machine in the exercise room of the building where he lives.  Unfortunately, he confided the machine doesn't work.  As he was leaving the room to begin my zap session I piped up...."Maybe you could just try to quit eating chips!"  He laughed and shut the door and I was left there thinking "How stupid was that to say that to someone who has the power and control over this huge radiation monstrosity that is going to begin it's orbit around me in a few minutes!"  Nice girl, short a few bricks I'm thinking!

Finished my session and Kelli and I headed to Tim Hortons for breakfast.  She had teaching sessions today and I got to go and see my future daughter-in-law, Lindsey try on her wedding dress!  Oh my goodness.  The dress is stunning as is the girl in it!  I can hardly wait to see her traipsing across the beach in 109 days, 18 hours, 37 minutes and 12 seconds!

From the dress fitting I came home for lunch then off to another Geoff hockey game.  They played for 90 minutes with a total of 8 players.  They looked a little weary at the end of their session but did manage to pull off a win!  yahoo....I really do need to find my old cow bell that I used to take to his games when he was little!  Trouble is he never scored then so I never got to ring it for him. It would be so much more fun now that he scores!  The problem is I probably would find myself off the invite list!
Came home from the game, bundled up and headed over to Nose Hill for the full loop.  Boomer glad to have his boots on again and happy for a full walk.  We have been a little abbreviated this week for obvious reasons! Tomorrow last day of week 2 then hospital freedom for two days!  Love, love, love the weekends!
Leslie

Wednesday 18 January 2012

Well, Hump day of week two.  Two chemos down, three to go.....8 radiations down 15 to go!  I'm getting there.  Saw the oncologist today and other than a bit of flushing in my face no ill effects.  He said it's early and he expects that in a week or so I will start to feel "Less than sub-human!"  Hmmm....didn't like that comment much but I guess even I know that there is probably not a hope in hell I will sail through this without some down times.  A few weeks of pain, a lifetime of gain, right!  Unfortunately, for my family I am not the best patient.  They have been so good to me I am going to have to really try to put on a bright front!  Who knows maybe that doctor doesn't know what he's talking about!?  yeah right!

It is sooo cold out today that we came straight home and have decided that home is where we plan to stay for most of the day.  We may go see Warhorse tonight?  Anyone seen that one?  I'll just get a big bucket of hot buttered popcorn….and settle in for the show!!!

I keep getting notes from people telling me they are reading these ramblings so I will continue to post.  If they bore you don't feel obligated to read them!  Know that when you reinforce my behaviour though I will continue on my merry way!  Have a great day!  Stay warm!  Drink a smoothie with a cinnamon bun!!!  Guaranteed to improve your insulation factors!  I'm living proof!

Tuesday 17 January 2012

Today no talk of treatment.  It was a non-event.  Appointment was at 8:24 I made it on time, parked illegally at the hospital and did not get a ticket and was "Done like Dinner" by 8:34 (my friend Connie's quote!)

Today was an awesome, amazing, overwhelming, fantastic day!  I can only hope the people who made it so get a chance to read why!  So.....here goes....from the hospital I went to Friends and had my usual high caloric breakfast with my friend Jenifer who ate what I would have really loved.  Cheated and had two cups of coffee this morning and it was wickedly delightful!  No Bill reminding me that I should limit my caffeine intake! From there home to take Boomer out for his walk.  It is so cold out that he held his paws up one at a time and accepted his booties co-operatively without the usual wresting match we engage in. Got home and my brother dropped by for a visit.  I have not seen him for months as they have been down in the Baha wind surfing and enjoying milder temperatures. When he left,  my good friend and old teaching partner from my Beddington Heights days,  Diane dropped by with her contribution to the "Plump up Leslie" campaign, a delicious banana bread! She also had a very large envelope in her hands that was left on my front step!  This is where the day really took off!  A package full of positive praise and a LOT of pampering from parents past and present who positively think the world of me!  I sat on my couch and read every single card, letter, story, quote and message.  I laughed and I cried, sometimes at the same time!  THANK YOU so much!  I hope you all know how much I love each and every one of you and your wonderful kids!  It is my biggest sorrow to have left so suddenly with no opportunity to talk to the kids and all of you.  It is I who have been the lucky one.  To have taught at Ranchlands School for over 15 years and to teach my passion is something many teachers do not get the opportunity to do.  PE specialists at the elementary level are sadly a dying breed.  I never have lost sight of the fact that I was one of the lucky ones who was pretty much spared the axe and a large part of the reason for that is the support I have enjoyed from you! I will enjoy your gifts for pampering although I must confess I am starting to feel a little like a pampered, spoiled princess!
My family should be worried that I might get too used to this and expect it when I am better!  (Pretty sure they won't let that happen)....  The very best part for me though was the time each of you took to send me the most beautiful and powerful messages.  You are my strength and I thank each of you for that.  The fact that you are all pulling for me and believe in me means the world to me.  LOVE, HUGS AND MORE LOVE

I give the day an 11 out of 10 (and if the Flames win tonight it will be 15 out of 10!  Best day I have had in a month!

Monday 16 January 2012

Today is the start of week 2.  Mondays are long but still cruising along with no adverse effects.  Had both treatments today and was finished a little earlier which gave us time to go for lunch and then catch Geoff's hockey game!  He scored two goals!!! Even when they are 29 you want to stand up and cheer at the top of your lungs when they score!!! 

When we were in the coffee shop having lunch I went to the biffy and saw a poster on the wall that I loved.  It was titled VISION and the message was "Effort and courage are not enough without purpose and direction."  It seemed so appropriate for me at this time.  People are continually commenting that they are amazed at how positive I am.  I think most of you might be surprised at yourself if you were faced with this.  There really are only two choices to make in my opinion and the other is not an option. I know this is not going to be easy but I also know that I can do this.  I thank each and everyone of you who takes the time to remind me of this every single day!  Kelli put an ap on my phone today,  It is a countdown to the end of treatment.  I have 22 days, 19 hours, 19 minutes and 10 seconds to be finished the treatment phase.  My short term goal of course is Geoff and Lindsey's wedding which is om 112 days 18 hours, 18 minutes and 3 seconds!  I plan to be there!  Short and long term goals are really important.

I was talking to my friend Caroline yesterday and we were talking about winning and losing.  I told her I am such a hypocrite. I have a huge confession to make and some of you (including Caroline) already know it.  Although I constantly preach to kids that winning is not important, it actually is really important to me!  I still think you have to play fair, play hard but honestly I HATE LOSING AT ANYTHING.  I'm really not that great of a sport!  There it is said.  I hope the parents of the kids I teach who are reading this are not shocked!!

I seem to be rambling today...must be the drugs!  Talk to you tomorrow!

Sunday 15 January 2012

Never have I appreciated a weekend more!  No drugs, no hospital.....pretty much normal!  Normal is such a nice thing I'm discovering!

Got up this morning to cold and blowing snow and bundled up to take Boomer out for his morning walk!  As I walked along it occurred to me what a good example he sets for me.  Every day is good!  Activity is the best!  Eat your food with enthusiasm.....quantity doesn't matter, the more the better!  Greet everybody with a wag of the tail!  There is good in almost everone (except German Shepards, Huskies and Shitzus)!

I also had to chuckle when I thought about how many people have offered to walk or take care of him for me.  Although I am still going strong I thought this week might be a good time to test those offers.  -minus 29.....I'm not feeling like going outside....who wants to walk the dog???  Just kidding.  I wouldn't do that to any of you but Bill would!  

Kelli comes today.  Poor girl.  Leaving balmy Vancouver for this!  Hopefully the cold snap is short lived.  I may come to appreciate the hot flashes that can come with chemo and radiation!

Week 2 starts tomorrow!  The countdown continues.  Please know how much I love your emails, your phone calls, your cards, your treats, your words of encouragement, your promises to exercise and eat well and take care of yourself (if you made that promise I will hold you to it and you know who you are C and K!!!)
Love you

Friday 13 January 2012

One down and four to go!  Got through week one without anything too bad happening.  Today another good day.  Machines are up and running and I am out of there in about 10 minutes.  Left the Tom Baker today and saw a couple of patients hooked up to their chemo outside while having a smoke.  Just makes me shake my head.  Go figure that one!  Met a couple of friends for lunch which was a nice bonus to the day!  So happy to have a weekend without hospital visits!  Kelli coming home on Sunday for the month.  Very excited to have her home for a bit although I keep telling her it is totally not necessary.

Thursday 12 January 2012

Almost over the first week and still going strong!!!  Today was great...in and out.  Earlier in the week one of their machines broke down so there was a huge backlog and wait.  Today I actually got in early and they were very pleased with me because I hadn't eaten today within the two hour window.  I keep screwing them up with that because Bill keeps feeding me.  Today I was a star patient!!!  My technician was not stiff today so I gave her a stern talking to...Tonight she had better work harder if she plans to be ready for her 10 Km race.

Think I was only there for a total of 10 minutes today then did some therapy that was fun.  Some of you girls know it well....RETAIL THERAPY!!!  Kelli and Lindsey swear by it and I can see why.  Bought a new coffee table and a bowl to go on top.  Great fun.  My living room is starting to look pretty spiffy!  Has only taken me 24 years to furnish it but it is looking good!  Tomorrow the end of week one.  Yahooooo!!!!!  Only four to go!

Wednesday 11 January 2012

4/23 to go.  Reached the hump day of week 1 with no adverse effects.  Just wanted to say thanks to some of my goofball friends who have found a way to send me humour through email.  I have had some really good chuckles from a few of you!  Believe me, I have not lost my sense of humour!  Today I was coaching my radiation technician on running the St. Patrick's Day 10 Km run.  I told her she better show up to work stiff tomorrow!  Each day I go in they draw a bull's eye right between my breasts with a sharpie!  It is really quite disconcerting to get up in the morning and see it when you look in the mirror.  I feel like someone is going to shoot me which I guess they are technically doing.  I am now referring to the technicians as the chefs who are microwaving me. Sick, sick sense of humour I know but I can't help myself!

Sleeping at night is becoming a bit of an issue.  Think it might be some of the medications they are feeding me.  In the past three days I think I have had more meds than I have ever had in my entire life.  Bill has taken on the role of being my personal organizer.  For those of you who know him you can appreciate my color coded binder complete with spread sheets, appointment schedules, etc. etc.  I carry it to and from the hospital in a Lulu Lemon bag!

Got a lovely note today from my dear teaching partner Rebecca.  I guess they have told the kids about me which I am grateful for.  I do want to go and see them but need to time my visit for a time when my immune system is not compromised.  That could be a bit of a challenge but I will see how it goes.
Stay tuned…..all is good.  Love you

Tuesday 10 January 2012

Probably won't update this everyday as some days like today are basically a non event.  4/23 to go!  Second day of radiation and other than the fact my appointment was 45 minutes late because one of the machines was down it was basically a non-event!  Hoping I can continue to have days like this when my biggest problem is a small wait!  Geoff and Lindsey got back from Whistler last night and brought me some more cinnamon buns from a spot Lindsey loves in Vancouver.  Must confess they are delicious but I am starting to worry I am going to start looking like a cinnamon bun! Still feeling good.....working out, walking Boomer, feeling guilty I'm not at work! (well just a little).

Monday 9 January 2012

Well, had my first full day at the hospital.  Started the day off with my $30 a pill anti nausea drugs followed by some steroids.  For a girl who hates taking even tylenol this was tough but as promised I am doing as told. We arrived at the Tom Baker at 10 AM where I had my first round of chemo.  A very weird experience to be sitting there amongst very sick people and thinking "I just don't fit".  This experience took about 2.5 hours then we headed across to Tim Hortons for lunch.  Back to the Tom Baker for radiation.  Longer today because I had to meet with a couple of people to hear the side effects etc.  The radiation itself only takes about 10 minutes and they beam you from many directions, all beams guided by my tatoos!  Whoever would have thought I would have tatoos??!!!  I finished the day feeling totally fine.  No side effects, no nausea......having said that I am not naive enough to think I am going to sail through the whole five weeks like this.  The hard part is believing what they are predicting for me starting as early as next week!  Hmmmm....won't go into those details until they happen.  In any case I will take every good day and enjoy it to the max!

Thank you, thank you, thank you to each and every one of you who has taken the time to phone, to email, to visit,to bring me books and other assorted treats, to cook, etc.    There has not been a single day that I have not had a positive message from friends.

I am overwhelmed by your support but I am positive that all your prayers and positive vibes are going to do the trick.  Many of you have offered to help out with ANYTHING and I do appreciate it.  One of the most popular offers is to walk Boomer.  At the moment I am enjoying doing this myself and a few friends have joined me on my loop around Nose Hill.  I do know, however, there may come a point that I may take you up on this offer if you are totally serious.  I know that on days 8-11 following my chemo days I will have compromised immunity.  These are days I need to be careful to stay away from people who are not well, to wash my hands frequently, to avoid excessive contact with pets etc.  They may also be days when I may not be feeling as well as I do now.  Who knows, but these may be days when I could use some help with my beloved pal!  He is quite puzzled by all of this and has been a little strange.  Dogs really do have a sense when things aren't right.
So, five chemos, down one, four to go (As Edie pointed out to me!) and 25 radiations, one down, 24 to go!  Will keep you posted!

Kelli is coming back on the 15th to be home for a month.  She has managed to arrange to do her Emergency Medicine round in Calgary.

Friday 6 January 2012

Not much to report but again thanks to all for your support.  I can't tell you how much your emails, cards and phone calls mean.  My good friend Maureen arrived today with 6 large (high caloric) cinnamon buns from my very favorite cinnamon bun spot in Kihei, Maui.  She carried them all the way back to Calgary, arrived home today at 5:30 AM and found the energy to deliver them to me this afternoon!

Today I had another endoscope and a bronchoscopy.  The surgeon had told me he would want to do these before my treatments began but to be honest I was secretly hoping he had forgotten.  No such luck.  Got the call yesterday that I needed to be at the Foothills Hospital this morning at 7 AM!  No coffee!!  No food!!  That makes for a grumpy patient.  This time I was prepared.  Arranged my ride and had my arm out for the full sedation!  Much, much better when you are asleep!  I was out cold for two hours and even when I came too I was out of it, legally impaired for 24 hours.  No driving, no cooking (bohoo), take it easy!  All was fine and as expected and I am now ready to start things moving at 10:15 AM, Monday morning!  As strange as it might sound, I can hardly wait!

Tuesday 3 January 2012

Well...first of all Happy New Year to all!  We celebrated our New Year as we often do...with my cousin Trish, her husband Gerry, kids, John and Heather and Kelli and Mike.  We were all in Whitefish at Trish and Gerry's new place!  Geoff and Lindsey also were down for a couple of days but had to return to Calgary on the 31st as they worked bright and early on New Years Day!

Kelli and I decided that a blog might be the good way to go with me as many of you are wondering what is going on.  I always knew I had lots of friends but when something like this happens you really start to realize how much people care about you and how much you care about them!  Honestly, everyone, the most difficult part so far has been telling each of you this awful news.

It has been a busy couple of weeks to say the least.  Despite it being the holiday season I have been cruising through the Medical System in high gear.  On my first visit to the Tom Baker the doctor seeing me glanced at my file and said "My goodness....you are on the fast track!  This is how the medical system should work!"  I know everyone does not have this experience so I am very grateful that things have been working for me in this regard.

My family have been wonderful.  Kelli came home as soon as she heard and spent three weeks with us.  It was nice to have her come with us to the many appointments because she often thought of questions that neither Bill nor I considered.  On the downside I think she knows a little more about what is in store for me which makes her worry more.  I have done very little reading on the subject of my condition, my attitude being they are going to what they are going to do and I am going to respond the way I am going to respond so reading and being prepared isn't going to make one speck of difference.  Geoff and I are much alike in this regard!  He is very positive and never have I appreciated his positive attitude more than I do now.
Bill is looking after me and trying so hard to "plump" me up!  This is the first time in my life I have had a goal to gain weight!  It is a very weird thing to purposefully order french fries and then eat every last one!
The Christmas baking everyone has been bringing me has gone to good use this year!  I have so many friends that are excellent cooks!  Funny how we all want to feed each other in times like this.  I am the same way but am now on the receiving end!

OK...so the purpose of this blog is to keep you posted on what is going on.  I have had four CAT scans, a PET scan (which tells if the cancer has spread), a pulmonary function test (I blew their machine out of the room performing at 160% of normal), a ECG (abnormal....my hear rate was 40 BPM which is normal for me)  The scariest test for me was the PET as this was the determiner of what happens from this point forward.  This was the best news for us as the cancer is localized which means I am going for the CURE!!!  It is not going to be easy but it is doable!  I had my PET scan on December 30.  Scariest thing I have ever done.  Bill and I then got in the car and headed for Whitefish.  When we reached the US border the alarms were going off.  I was told to step out of the car and three big customs officers came out of the building and escorted me inside while Bill had to drive the vehicle through a sensor to see if there were radioactive substances in the vehicle.  Once inside the building I was scanned with a machine to determine what "substance" alerted their alarm system.  This entire process took half an hour and they finally agreed to let me through warning me that in the future I should travel with a letter from my doctor.  I guess I will be radioactive for some time!

We had such a nice time down in Whitefish.  I feel so healthy right now I sometimes have to shake my head when I know what really is going on.  Sometimes I think they are going to tell me they made a mistake and mixed me up with someone else.  Wishful thinking.  My PET did come back clear though so now I go onto the next step which is five weeks of radiation and chemotherapy combined. My first treatment starts on January 9. I  will have my chemo on Mondays for five weeks and radiation five days a week for five weeks.  Should have just shaved my head at the Terry Fox Head Shave.....am regretting now that I didn't as I am going to lose my hair!  On the good side I already know what I look like bald and it wasn't that bad!  My short term goal is to be healthy enough to be in Mexico in May for Geoff and Lindsey's wedding and believe me this is not a party I want to miss!!!  I will be doing EVERYTHING in my power to be there.

Thankyou to each of you who has said prayers for me, to all of you who remembered to say your White Rabbits on January 1 (for the first time ever Bill said it and meant it!), to all of you who phone me just to talk,to those who drop by for a visit,  to all of you who have brought me goodies, for the email messages, for the many offers to do absolutely anything from driving me to appointments, to walking Boomoer, to cleaning and cooking.  Right now I don't need any of these favours but it means a lot that you have offered.  Thankyou to all the people in my life.  I am truly blessed and I know it!